Time flies so fast, it was just the other day when our little girl was born. My baby sister came when I was back in high school. When I heard about it, I sincerely had mixed feelings. Some part of me was excited for I couldn’t imagine having a moving doll, the other part was jealous, because I was no longer going to be the last born of the family.
Anyway, my little sister is all grown and we can sit have a chat like real ladies do. Before schools were closed she called and asked if she could come spend the holiday at my place with her best friend, which I absolutely said yes to. Friendship is a gift from God and I am one person who believe so much in that. I Sincerely treasure my friends and this is something I couldn’t say no to.
It’s funny how when you are the lastborn every time you get a break from school, your siblings are always fighting over you. This is my story every Christmas holiday, I am always fighting with my other elder sister on who’s house the little sister is going to visit. The person who I don’t want to be in this situation is my mom, she always doesn’t know how to divide her little girl. lol 😉 Luckily, I won this time round. After finalizing everything with mom my baby sister and her best friend were set for the trip.
On their arrival date, I got to the station so early, I was super excited to have them for the holiday. As soon as the bus stopped Daisy came out, looking so tired, of course it was such a long journey I didn’t expect otherwise. She immediately spotted me and we both found ourselves smiling. I was thrilled to see them, and officially met Jane her best friend. Amazing tall girl, with a cute smile and dimples on her cheeks.
As we went home, I kept on asking them questions and getting answers from both, in deed Jane was as talkative as Daisy. You can imagine how happy I was noticing that, because I love talking too😉. I like having people who are outspoken, I find it very easy to handle such people because you can always know what’s going on with them.
It was a Sunday evening and the roads were clear. We got home at around 6.30pm. They both freshened up and settled in. We later had dinner, followed by a little chit chat, then we all went to bed by 10.30pm.
The following morning before leaving for work I shared with them a few house rules. I think my entire life I’ve been governed by different rules that I set yearly. Some would say, I am too tough on myself others would be like I am so disciplined and live by my words. Well, it doesn’t really matter what they say, the only thing that matters is what I feel about these rules and why I set. To be sincere, I started living alone at an early age and looking back today, these ruled have saved me a lot of times.
The house rules were not that hard, things like; switch off the lights when you are leaving a room, follow the menu religiously, when it’s time to snack, make sure you do so, drink water at least 5 glasses or more a day; -}, wear a sweater and a pair of socks by 4pm everyday while in doors, sleeping time, 11pm unless we extend our movie night. Very simple things, right?😉
During the day, I used to go to work and leave them at home with a couple of movies and series to watch. My love for cooking made their lives even better, for I used to prepare all the meals they needed for the day before leaving the house. They made my life more interesting and made me have a sneak peek of my future self in line with being a parent.
When I agreed to have these two for the holiday I wasn’t sure what to expect or didn’t know how exactly to handle teenagers but with time everything fell into place. We became this loving family of 3👩👧👧, who enjoyed every moment in our home. Allow me to share with you a few tips that made our days rock and made us connect more. 😊
- Rules and Regulations: Its good to establish house rules that will help the teenagers become more responsible and growing up to be more independent. At first it wasn’t easy for them to abide by these rules. Sometimes one could forget to wear socks but the moment I stepped in and looked at their feet, it was pretty obvious. These rules helped me a lot having them around and at some point I was the one being reminded to wear my jumper after 4pm..lol 🤣
- Involve them in your plans: Just like any other relationship, it’s always good to be like an open book to the other person. Let them know your plans for the day. My little girls enjoyed this part the most, they used to help me select what to wear going to work/events. I could change like ten times as they help me decide, the house became my runway. These two used to laugh at how I used to turn my closet upside down then start re-arranging again, because I love my clothes in a certain order. I shared with them my future plans and was always encouraging them to dream, because without dreaming there’s nowhere you can get in life. The bonding sessions made me learn so much about teenagers and how they view life, they shared their dreams and some of them really amazed me.🤗
- Have family indoors/outdoors activities: I think I am one person who just love games. We used to play cards and whoever loses was to clean the dishes the entire day after. Thank God, I didn’t lose any. Friday and Saturday night were our movie hangout nights. We could make some popcorns for the night and be seated by 8.15pm for our movie. One of the lessons I learnt during this entire time, is that I became very selective with movies, they all had to be family movies or inspirational, something that would suit a teenager. I didn’t know it was such a hustle to get a movie before but yeah I am sure you understand what type of scenarios I was trying to avoid. Our last movie together was very interesting. It got us shouting and even praying at some point, it was so engaging. Yeah, I am sure you’re about to ask which movie it was, Uncle Drew is the name of the Movie, I hope you get to watch it one day.
- Menu: I always find it easy to work with home Menu, because it does help a lot and reduces the stress of thinking of what to eat every day. This helped my girls for they could easily just remove whatever was to be prepared early enough before I get home.If there was anything to be bought it did help too. They knew places to buy them from and by the time I was getting home everything was set for me to cook.
- Be the big sister/a friend: This was and still is my favorite of them all. We could talk about life and everything in it that I have learnt. I spent most of my free times in the kitchen showing them how to make different foodstuff. Can you imagine, Jane even taught me how to make good Mandazi’s, something she learnt from her mum. Our cooking days were the best. We used to have them on Sunday’s afternoons right after church. We became so close and loved our house so much that whenever we visited some of our relatives, they kept on asking me what time we were going back home. Being a big sister of course I had to know the things they needed to tick off their bucket list. Most of them were very simple things but were important to them. If not all, I believe we managed to do almost everything on their lists. I enjoyed every bit of being a big sister and a friend and getting to more about my two little girls.
The holiday season came to an end, on my way back home after seeing them off, it was such a long emotional journey. I got to my house which was very lonely, I couldn’t even spend a night there. I found myself going to my cousin’s place and stayed there for at least two nights before getting back to my place. I was so used to having people around me and I wasn’t ready to be alone. I kept checking up on them until we all got back to normal. Although, I still wonder how my mama used to deal with this story of us leaving her after every long holiday, going back to boarding school.
This entire experience taught me a lot of things but the toughest one was being a parent. This role required a delicate balance between giving them enough guidance to ensure they are making the right choices in whatever they are doing and also giving them enough freedom to make mistakes. I sincerely want the best for them but sometimes it’s good to make mistakes, because that where we all learn from, right? Today I pray to God to protect them and make all their dreams come to pass. 🙌🏽